The Creek AU Collection
by AllergicToAlmonds
Summary: Creek one-shot stories all set in different AUs. Feel free to make requests!
1. AN

**Title:** The Creek AU Collection

**Summary: **Creek one-shot stories all set in different AUs. Feel free to make requests!

**Rating: **I'm gonna say M but it really varies on the AU.

**Pairings: **Well, obviously Creek (Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak) and some other pairings but I'm gonna name them in every chapter.

**Warnings: **Again, I'll name them in every chapter.

**Disclaimer: **I don't anything that has anything to do with South Park or its characters. Once again I'm gonna say this thing in every chapter.

**AN: **Yeah, okay, so the other day (like Saturday) I was listening to this music list I made on my phone and doodling random Craig/Tweek drawings. I was listening to 'King and Lionheart' by Of Monsters and Men and so drew a picture of Craig as a king and Tweek as his 'lionheart' (yeah, I don't really know, I'm not sorry). A thought hit me like: "Hey what if I made a story out of this?" and then suddenly I was doodling all other classic AUs to Creek. My friend destroyed my stream by calling on a tequila night, but later on I made a list of classic AUs and then had this great idea: I'm gonna make this a collection. Also, the wonderful authors on AO3 have inspired me to write more, because they make such wonderful fics (and it's not as limited as FF) and they also post the best AUs EVER.

Anyway, enough of this rambling: there will be Creek AU one-shots. Depending on the one-shot it will be romance or friendship or both and there will be sex, triggering stuff, cursing, violence and other stuff that might make you uncomfortable. I will warn you on every chapter so please read the AN. Okay? Cheers mate, I think that was it.

Oh, and also, I have this huge headcanon that Tweek has freckles. I dunno why, but it seems legit so I'm gonna roll with that. Cool? Cheers mates!

Feel free to give me your favourite AUs (Alternate Universe) and I'll try to write something to them. They can also be books, movies, TV series' or something like that and I'll make a Creek version out of it.

Also, English isn't my first language so all mistakes are my own. I take full responsibility.

This is just an informative chapter, I'm gonna post the first one later today when I'm done with it. Feel free to tell me what you think of this before I post it.

Okay, cheers mates!

- Abunai-san


	2. Hogwarts AU - He calls me Yellowhammer

**Title: **Hogwarts AU – He calls me Yellowhammer

**Summary: **Craig Tucker, a Slytherin, is constantly bullying Tweek Tweak, a Hufflepuff, and doesn't seem to be able to admit that he is completely smitten.

**Rating: **Yah, it's T. I'm lame.

**Pairings: **Creek.

**Warnings: **Lol, well, there's slash and then there's magic. And bullying. That's a bad thing, children. Also, maybe some stereotypical stuff considering the Houses of Hogwarts.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Harry Potter or South Park.

**AN: **I LIED. I said I was going to post this chapter later that day but it was like a week ago. Sue me. Anyway, this is such a must in all AU things! Harry Potter gave the world so much and it makes a wonderful environment for everything! This is totally a classic, so I hope it's good enough.

Enjoy!

**- 1. Hogwarts AU – He calls me Yellowhammer -**

"Retards!"

The shout made Tweek Tweak, a 15 year old Hufflepuff boy, flinch. He glanced quickly to his side to see his best friend Thomas glaring at three third-year Slytherin boys, who had yelled at them.

"Yeah, because that's so unique and creative!" he yelled back and pulled Tweek along the hallway before the Slytherins could say anything, or worse, start using their wands.

The blond in question looked troubled but gathered some of his black robes and jogged to keep his pace up to match his friend's. "Maybe we should just ignore them..."

Thomas scoffed at that. "Yeah, Tweekers, we tried that technique last year and what did that get us? Nothing."

Tweek said nothing, just dropped his gaze back to the Transfiguration books he was carrying in his hands.

His friend sighed again. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to sound like a total jerk," he slung his arm acoss Tweek's shoulder and gave him a nudge. Tweek glanced up at him and gave a tentative smile, which Thomas answered with his own.

"I just don't know... I mean we're in fifth year and all, so we should be mature enough to ignore their taunts," Tweek sighed as they turned around the corner to fall in line with other fifth-year Hufflepuffs. There was a total seven of them: Bradley Biggle, Leopold 'Butters' Stotch, Abigail Williams, Anna Middleton, Rebecca 'Red' Stevens and of course, Thomas and Tweek, the latter being the youngest of them.

Abigail, a girl with honey-coloured hair gave them a smile. "You guys have no idea how much I hate these lessons," she said.

Red rolled her eyes. She had a surprisingly fierce spirit for a Hufflepuff. "Yeah, I think we all have a pretty clear idea of how much you hate these lessons. We all do."

There was a murmur of agreement from the rest of them. Tweek leaned back against a wall and felt the dread of the class coming up fill him. Really, transfiguration was easy to him all right but since there was so few Hufflepuffs they had to share the lesson with some other House. And what House was that? Slytherin.

As if right on cue, the fifth-year Slytherins walked up.

There was seven of them as well: Clyde Donovan, a chubby boy with brown hair and a nasty attitude, Daphne Greengrass, a black-haired girl with a low regard on everybody except herself, Eric Cartman, the meanest boy anyone had ever met, Samantha Bradshaw, a blonde girl who giggled like the Devil, Ethan Hunter, a boy who liked to point out other's mistakes loudly and pointingly, Token Black, a black boy who really had no part in the other's bullying, and of course, the worst of all demon Slytherins crawling the halls of Hogwarts.

Craig Tucker.

He was tall, lean yet well muscled young man with jet black hair and cold, uncaring blue eyes. He rarely said anything, except for snide remarks and other unplesanteries, just regarded people with his frightening eyes and flipped them off without apparent reason. All in all, he was rude and uncaring little sod with a rich family, which made him all the more unpleasant. _And the worst of it all_,' Tweek thought as he watched them fall in line next to the Hufflepuffs. _'He is so handsome.'_

Yes, people, Tweek Tweak though that his constant bully, Craig Tucker, was as hot as all Hell itself.

It had all started in the Hogwarts Express on their first year. Tweek had been small and in trouble finding himself a place to sit. Suddenly, there had been a copartment with only one, bored looking boy in it and so Tweek (as shy as he was) had decided that it wouldn't kill him to go and ask if the place was free. So he had went inside and introduced himself, properly as his parents had taught him, and asked if the place opposite the boy had been free. The boy had looked at him from toes to his golden hair with his cold gaze and then asked: "What are you, a fucking yellowhammer?"

Tweek had been so surprised by this that he didn't say anything, just stood there with a flushed face and so Craig had flipped him off with a 'piss off'. Tweek had swallowed his shock and gone to the next one, with Thomas inside it. He had gained his best friend that day but also his bully, who had taken as his lifegoal to humiliate Tweek every day possible.

This, of course, was easy in these Transfiguration lessons.

"Yeah, just piss off!" Red snapped with Bradley and Thomas and conveniently pulled Tweek out of his memories. All the Hufflepuffs had turned to look at the Slytherins and were wearing identical expressions of anger on their faces, while most of the Slytherins wore smirks, the only exceptions being Token and Craig. Quite suddenly, the latter turned his cold eyes on Tweek and gave a _smirk._

"What you say, Yellowhammer?" he asked as the rest of his classmates laughed at the nickname he had given Tweek. "Should we use you sissies as transfiguration objects today? Since there's no need for you to learn anything like that anyway."

Tweek blushed red and already opened his mouth to give a good retort, when Professor McGonagall opened the door and they were all but pushed in.

The blonde dropped his books down on his desk at the back of the classroom just as Thomas came to sit next to him. He sighed and rubbed his temples. "I am so done with those dicks!" he hissed, hoping that his voice wouldn't carry out to Professor McGonagall.

Tweek nodded. "Maybe we should actually tell someone about it," he suggested quietly as their transfiguration teacher began giving them instructions for the day.

To his surprise, his friend looked apprehensive. "I don't know... I mean what can they do?" Thomas looked uneasy. "Everyone knows that the Slytherins bully people, especially us. What could they possibly do?"

The other Hufflepuff considered this for a moment. "You're right," he whispered back and pretended to take notes on whatever McGonagall was writing on the board. "But we should at least _try_ to tell someone."

Thomas turned to look at him properly. "What's the point?"

Tweek glanced to their teacher before turning to look at his best friend. "I mean, if we tell on them at least they will know that this sort of bullying happens! If we acknowledge it, they will too-"

Thomas shook his head. "But it doesn't matter," he said and took his quill and parchament to make some notes.

The blond scrunched his nose in disappointment. "Because?" he asked in a whisper and leaned towards Thomas, done pretending taking notes on the class.

His friend gave him a brief glance. "Because they know that it happens but still won't do anything about it."

Tweek grabbed his bicep and Thomas turned to look at him with a frown on his face. "C'mon Tommy!" he whispered, using Thomas's childhood nickname, which never failed to make him blush. "Where's your bravery?"

Thomas, who was still red on the face, snorted. "I'm not a Gryffindor, I don't need to be brave."

Tweek giggled and cradled his friend's arm. "Oh, you're a sissy then?"

The other boy turned to him with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Did you just call me a sissy, Tweekers?"

A huge grin spread across his freckled face. "So what if I did?"

Thomas gave him a match of his own. "Then you'll be sorry soon enough!"

He then gave Tweek's very sensitive side a poke, which caused to blond to squeak and giggle and let go of Thomas's arm to protect himself. However, Thomas didn't give him that chance as he poked the poor boy on the side again, while the said boy giggled and tried to wiggle away from his fingers as far as possible without falling off the chair.

They were so lost in their poke and dodge game that they didn't notice Minerva McGonagall untill she was standing in front of their desks with a very stern and disapproving look on her face.

"Mr. Tweak and Mr. Laville!" she snapped, startling both boys as they quickly jumped apart. "I hope you find this lesson interesting."

"Oh yes," Thomas nodded in a very strict manner. "We do."

Professor McGonagall raised an eyebrow at that and looked down at them as if wondering did the two deserve to be on her lesson at all. That was when Tweek noticed that the entire class was staring at them, the Hufflepuffs with the air of knowing what was coming and feeling sorry for them and the Slytherins with the air of knowing what was coming and feeling extremely gleeful about it. He tried to look as small as possible in his seat and glanced up to see Craig staring straight at him. Tweek felt his eyebrows rise on their own accord at his expression: it was lightly veiled annoyement. Why was he annoyed? As far as Tweek knew, Craig wasn't at all interested in Tranfiguration, so he would have no reason to look like that even thought Thomas and Tweek had interupted the lesson quite rudely. Other odd thing was that Craig was staring squarely at him, as if the rest of the world did not matter to him. Tweek felt so small under this gaze that his cheeks started to heat up and he had to look away before he would spontaneously combust. He could still feel the intensy of those cold, blue eyes on him and shivered. Why was he staring at him? Why was it affecting him so strongly? Did Craig want to hit him? Even when Craig bullied him, it was always on the mental level. For some reason he never did touch Tweek, he rather told him he looked like a disshelved yellowhammer who should lay off the coffee. So what had caused him to be so annoyed? Tweek shook his head. No use thinking that when it really lead nowhere.

"Would you like to repeat what we have been studying so far then, Mr. Laville?" asked Professor McGonagall, bringing Tweek back to reality. He turned to look at Thomas who had paled.

"Uh..." he said, leaning to the side of his desk to look at the board that was behind their professor. "We learned something considering transfiguration?" he suggested with a hopeful grin.

Professor McGonagall looked like she wanted to bang her head against the wall. "Yes, Mr. Laville," she agreed with forced calmness. "But what exactly?"

Now Thomas looked like at loss. Tweek felt a pang of quilt and sympathy: sympathy for his friend and quilt for being the reason they were in this situation to begin with. He was about to open his mouth and help his friend, when their teacher continued.

"As much as I expected. Next time, Mr. Laville and Mr. Tweak, do try to keep personal things personal and out of my classroom," she said briskly and stalked back to the front of the classroom. Tweek and Thomas shared a look and let out a breath of relief simultaneously.

Then McGonagall was speaking again. "As for the rest of the day, you will try the Colour-Change Spell on these guinea pigs brought to you," she explained, pointing to a cage filled with seven guinea pigs looking slightly confused. "Unfortunately, I was only able to get a hold of seven of them." She eyed them all, each of her students knowing what it meant. They had to be paired up.

Thomas squeezed Tweek's hand and they shared a smile. Trying new spells with Thomas was always fun, since they could talk and get it wrong as many times as they wished. Everyone was alredy pairing up with someone, all trying not be the one who had to be with the one who wasn't from their own House.

"BUT," McGonagall's strong voice halted them all and they looked at her with surprise. "I will decide your partners for today. There's already too much bad blood between your Houses as it is."

There were immidiately shouts of protest at that but the Professor started calling their names and deciding their partners for them.

"Miss Williams with Miss Greengrass..." A groan of defeat from Abigail and a very cold glare from Daphne.

"Mr. Stoch with Mr. Cartman..." Butters was positively shaking with fear as Cartman leered at him. The poor blond boy was probably going to faint.

"Mr. Biggle with Miss Bradshaw..." Bradley looked at Samantha with uncertainty as the girl completely ignored his presence.

"Miss Middleton with Mr. Donovan..." Anna gathered her books and moved to sit next to Clyde, who had his eyes glued to her breasts. Anna's face flamed up and she clutched the books more tightly to her chest.

"Miss Stevens with Mr. Black..." Token looked extremely apologetic and awkward as Red slammed to sit next to him. He was about to say something, probably sorry for this, but was silence aprubtly when Red's red hair was flipped to his face.

Tweek's heart was hammering in his chest. Only he, Thomas, Craig and Ethan Hunter were left. He prayed to Merlin that he would be paired with Ethan because he was lesser evil, feeling quilty for wishing Thomas to be with Craig, but he knew his best friend could handle himself better than Tweek.

"... so it's Mr. Lavine with Mr. Hunter..." McGonagall continued and Tweek felt something cold and awful fill his veins and freeze his heart for a second before it started thumping almost painfully against his chest. Thomas squeezed his hand again and looked at him so sympathetically that Tweek almost felt like crying out loud, before moving to sit next to Ethan Hunter who sneered at the sight of him.

Tweek's gaze dropped down to his desk. He could vaguely hear how McGonagall called Craig to be with, but couldn't do anything. His hands trembled and the only sound that existed was his blood pounding through his veins. How had this happened? Out of all the possibilities he had ended up with the worst. He was going to die. He knew it. Because whenever Craig bullied him, he did it without teachers noticing a thing, so McGonagall was going to think Tweek was pale and nervous only because of the new spell they were learning.

Books dropped down next to him and Tweek all but jumped few inches up in the air. He looked at Craig's impassive face with absolute horror before looking quickly back to his trembling hands. The other boy sat down next to him and tickled the guinea pig given to them. "You wouldn't sit next to me, so I came here," he answered the unasked question with his nasally monotone voice. All around them people started reluctantly working on their assigment and soon enough the classroom was filled with spells and speech.

Tweek was still trembling. He couldn't utter a word out of his even if his life depended on it and it sort of did. He knew that he wouldn't get anything done this lesson, and maybe he had to ask someone else teach him the Colour-Changing spell later on. Right now, he had to focus on how to block Craig's upcoming taunts and isults from his brain for the next half an hour or so.

Suddenly, he was shaken out of his silence and brooding by the little guinea pig walking towards him on his desk, looking very determined. Tweek looked at it in surprise: usually animals avoided him, if not including their family owl Mercurio who had always known him. Tweek didn't really know why they didn't want to be near him, but he suspected it had something to do with the fact that he tended to turn to a bundle of nerves when introduced to another living being. Now this little creauture was waddling his way towards him on a steady pace. Soon enough it had reached his arm and was exaiming the sleeve of his black robe with its sharp little teeth. The blond could feel how his mouth twitched to a nervous smile and he slid his trembling finger to the silky fur of the guinea pig munching him.

He didn't know how long he stroked the little creature when suddenly his partner's voice said: "I named him Stripe."

Once again Tweek squaked loudly and turned red as a tomato. He glanced down at the guinea pig, who was undisturbed by his noise but couldn't make himself to look up to Craig. From the corner of his eye he could see the other was leaning on his elbows and was bored as hell.

_'Oh my Merlin, is he making a small talk?' _Tweek wondered as he tried to keep his shaking hands on stroking the guinea pig now named Stripe. _'Why is he making a small talk? Is this some new form of torturing me? What?! Seriously, what is going on? Or maybe he isn't and is only talking because it looks like we're doing something? Oh, we should be doing something, if Professor McGonagall catches us we're both going to fail, and then who's to blame? ME! Craig's gonna make my life a living hell, it's OWLs year, I have no future if he kills me, OH DEAR MERLIN...'_

Suddenly Tweek outright yelped. Something warm had brushed his finger! The same finger that was petting Stripe! He looked down with his wide green eyes only to see a long, slender white finger also petting the guinea pig. The blonde didn't have to guess too many times who it was, since there was only one person close enough. While Tweek had pulled his own hand away in panic, Craig continued to pet Stripe as if nothing had happened.

Tweek cradled his hand to his chest and felt just plain weird. Suddenly it was hard to sit still on his seat and he didn't exactly know where to look. While Craig had his eyes on Stripe, the blond knew he was also observing him from the corner of his eye, which made it all the more harder to concentrate on just being still and acting normal. After a few minutes of sitting in silence Tweek started to feel like maybe he could endure the lesson till its end if he just kept to himself and let the demon beside him keep on petting the guinea pig they were supposed to be working on. He might never learn how to do a Colour-Changing spell properly, but at least he would get out of the classroom alive.

No such luck.

"Why is your hair so yellow?" Craig asked in that bored tone that had Tweek jumping about five feet into the air in surprise.

The blond shuffled nervously on his seat, not sure if he was really expected to answer the question. Or if he wanted to answer it anyway. So instead of answering, he just kept on fidgeting on his seat and hoped Craig would just keep on petting Stripe so he could focus on how to breathe normally again.

Once again, the other wizard next to him surprised him utterly: Craig ran a finger across Tweek's blonde locks.

Tweek was so stardled by his action that he slapped a hand to the side of his head where Craig's finger had just been, squaled like a baby squirrel and turned to look at his offender with a look of horror. Craig looked just as bored as he had been but something like smug satisfaction lingered on his face as Tweek tried catch his raging breath. The blond couldn't fathom what had possessed Craig to suddenly touch him as he usually threw his insults from a good distance.

Craig had never touched him before and now suddenly he had touched him twice in few minutes. What was going on?

"So why is your hair so yellow?" Craig asked again as he now had Tweek's undivided attention.

The other frowned. What was Craig playing at? He usually just ignored and/or taunted him and now he suddenly wanted to know about his haircolour and had actually _touched_ him. His head and hand, which were sort of personal. Tweek was beginning to feel annoyed instead of panicked: what exactly gave the other the permission to be so puzzling?

"I-I don't know," Tweek answered in a small voice, but kept looking at Craig with an annoyed expression.

Craig kept on looking bored but gave a hum to his answer. Tweek pouted slightly and for so first time, felt warm blood pounding on his cheeks and could only imagine how the red they were.

"You don't know?" Craig breathed out and leaned back on his seat. Stripe let out a somekind of a growl and waddled towards him, expecting more of cuddling and stroking. Tweek also turned slightly to keep an eye on the older wizard. Couldn't have him suddenly touching him again...

The noirette eyed him lazily but somehow still intensly which made Tweek blush all the more, but for once in his life, he didn't turn away to avoid the cool gaze. "I think you would make a good redhead."

Tweek sputtered and stared at Craig incrediously. "What?! Why would you say that?" he nearly yelled and professor McGonagall would have heard them if it hadn't been for Cartman's loud cackle at Butters's failed attempt at changing their guinea pig's colour.

"Because you have green eyes and freckles," Craig continued nasally while Tweek's eyebrows rose high towards his hairline. "Red hair would suit you."

The blond couldn't say anything to that (nor did he want to) he he turned back facing forwards on his seat again, trying to ignore what Craig had said. Red hair indeed! Tweek was most certainly sure red hair wasn't his thing. Besides, what was wrong with his blond? Blond was cool too! Why would Craig even pointing out something like that? Oh, the nerve of him! He knew a few redheads, like Kyle Broflovski from Ravenclaw or Ron Weasley from Gryffindor and there was nothing wrong with their red hair but it just didn't suit him! It was really quite rude to point something like that out, especially when Tweek's hair was naturally that blond... Tweek clenched his hands into fists and glared at his desk. There Craig went again, insulting him and his haircolour!

"Hey," said a voice next to his ear and this time Tweek knew it was Craig, but it didn't stop him from flinching violently. Still he glared at Craig from the corner of his eye. Well, glaring might be too strong word for it: more like pouted and looked like a pissed off cherub.

"Go out with me."

The blond's mouth went dry and his eyes nearly popped out of his head when he whipped around to stare Craig squarely with utter disbelief. His heart was hammering in his chest and blood pounded so hard against his eardrums that it was surprisingly diffucult to focus sorely breathing and keeping his vision clear.

"W-w-what?" he managed to stutter out with a high pitched voice. Craig had also turned fully facing his direction and while the rest of him reminded still and dispassionate, his blue eyes seemed to burn with determition and something else Tweek couldn't pinpoint. It wasn't malice but more like... hunger? At least something similiar to it.

"Go out with me," the noirette repeated on a slow and steady voice. Now that Tweek actually saw his mouth move, the words sank in. _Go out with me_. As in you, Craig and me, Tweek? _Go out with me. _Isn't that usually said when one wants to go on a date? _Go out with me_. Seriously? He had asked that? _Go out with me. _He was probaply supposed to say something to that, not just stare at Craig like a cow. _Go out with me_. What was he supposed to do outside? _Go out with me. _What was the usual answer to a question like that? _Go out with me_. Oh for Merlin's sake, Tweek, say something!

"Why?" For all the answers in the world...

Craig seemed unfazed by the question as he shuggered indifferently. "You're cute, smart and small. Kinda like a yellowhammer. I just want to know more," he explained monotonously but his eyes kept burning with unnamed feelings.

Tweek swallowed to get some saliva down his dry throat. _Cute, smart and small, like a yellowhammer. _What was going on?! Craig Tucker, his everyday bully, had just asked – no, demanded – him to go out with him as in a _date_. What the hell? _'It has to be a joke_,' the blond's mind supplied. Of course! Why else would Craig ask? Tweek's brow furrowed in anger as he felt his cheek's redden even more. Of all cruel jokes, this was by far the worst.

"Look, I don't appreciate being the butt of your joke," Tweek snapped angrily at Craig, who for a moment looked surprised and a little bit panicked.

Craig leaned forward and looked persuasive as he took Tweek's hands to his own and held them tight as Tweek tried to pull them away. "It's not a joke," he murmured softly and searched Tweek's face with his icy blue eyes. When Tweek only snorted, he tugged the blond closer.

"I have liked you since the first day we met: you were so small and cute even back then and you just stood there and it was just too much..." Craig dropped his head down to catch his breath and when he looked back up, there was truth in his eyes that completely caught Tweek's breath. Could it be true? Craig seemed to sincere...

Then the moment was broken as the bell rang and McGonagall started shouting homework. Tweek pulled his hands away from Craig's loose grip quickly and blushed all the way from the tips of his ears to his collarbone. He pulled all his stuff back to his bag and nearly ran to Thomas, who was waiting by the door.

"What's the matter? You look like a tomato..." Tweek slapped his friend's arm at that to which Thomas laughed. The blond snuck a glance over his shoulder to look at Craig, who was still sitting on their desks. When the noirette caught his gaze he winked lewdly and mouthed 'see you later, Yellowhammer.'

Needless to say, Tweek blushed and ran out of the classroom.

**AN: **Phew, done! Sorry everyone's so OOC in this, but it's my first time writing to South Park and I've had a three year gap with all the writing I've done, so this might not be the best one. But there's a lot more to come! I counted all the AUs I've made up so far and there's 57 of them. Well, there might be a little more since one of them is named 'Historical shit' and another 'Grimm fairytales', but we'll see...

Hope you enjoyed and now, please review this one!

- Abunai-san


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